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Discover the role of alcohol in your life.

Do you ever worry about the amount of alcohol you drink, or maybe you’re not happy with the results it’s giving you? If so, you’re not alone—many of us have been there. I started drinking at a young age, and it continued throughout my life. Sometimes I drank too much, but most of the time, it felt “normal.”

A few years ago, I started questioning my drinking. It became more frequent, and more often than not, it felt like too much. At first, I wasn’t thinking about quitting—I just wanted to cut back. That would work for a few weeks or months, but eventually, I’d fall back into my usual drinking habits. After all, everyone I knew did the same, so it felt “normal.”

But something had shifted. I started reading books about quitting, listening to podcasts, and even feeling envious of people who didn’t drink. The idea of quitting completely terrified me. No more drinking, ever? That thought was scary, but I also knew I didn’t want to stay where I was. I pictured myself ten years down the road, and I knew something had to change.

I want to have the energy to do all the things I love. I want to wake up with a clear head, ready to take on the day.

If you recognize yourself in this, I hope to inspire you to at least take a break from drinking and figure out what role alcohol plays in your life. It might seem like a scary thought, but it will be worth it, and you have nothing to lose.

Why can it be so hard to say no?

Some people have no trouble with moderation and can enjoy just a glass of alcohol now and then. Others, like me, struggle with it, and moderation can feel nearly impossible. Have you tried moderating your drinking and found it really hard? I’ve been there too. I’d set up a list of rules for myself: I wouldn’t drink on Mondays, Tuesdays, or Wednesdays. I’d only drink when I went out. I’d limit myself to 2 or 3 glasses when I did drink. But all that calculating and decision-making became exhausting. And if I broke one of my rules, I’d feel like a failure, weak, and defeated.

Let me tell you this—it’s not about weakness. It’s simply how our brains are wired. If you’re a regular drinker, you’ve built a habit, and our brains love habits because they’re easy and comfortable. When you try to change a habit, your brain will resist, but it is possible to rewire it—you just have to do the work.

If you just say "no" to a drink without changing your mindset, you’ll always feel like you're missing out, and life without alcohol may seem boring. The key is to pause when you feel the urge to drink. Instead of reaching for a glass of wine, take a moment to reflect on what’s behind that desire. What is it that you really need? What are your thoughts about having a drink? It’s not the alcohol itself creating the craving (at least not for the most of us)—it’s your thoughts about it. These thoughts create your feelings, and those feelings drive your actions.

If you can understand this dynamic, you’ll be able to drink less or quit without feeling deprived.

The Science behind drinking

When alcohol enters your system, it triggers a massive release of dopamine, giving you a strong hit of pleasure. Your brain knows this isn’t normal, so to balance things out, it releases a chemical called dynorphin. This may lead to feelings of anxiety or sadness, which can drive you to reach for another drink. However, with each drink, you sink lower. As you continue, the endorphins don’t work as effectively, and you never feel as good as you did after just one drink. Each subsequent drink pulls you further away from the initial high, eventually leaving you below your baseline happiness.

While alcohol initially boosts dopamine levels, the brain adapts to this overload with continued use. Over time, it produces less dopamine, reduces the number of dopamine receptors, and increases dopamine transporters to remove the excess. When you stop drinking, your “natural” dopamine baseline is lower than it should be, which can make you feel down or even depressed. The good news is that your brain will eventually restore its balance, and those negative feelings will subside.

Our brains have the ability to physically change and adapt based on how we use them. This is called neuroplasticity. New pathways are built and strengthened with repeated exposure to new information or behaviors, while old pathways weaken when not used. Think of it like a footpath in the woods: the first time you take a new path, it’s overgrown and hard to navigate. But with repeated use, the path becomes clearer and easier to walk. If you stop using that path, it will become overgrown again.

The dopamine release from drinking makes us feel good, and each time we drink, we reinforce the connection between alcohol and happiness. This pathway grows stronger, making the brain associate drinking with pleasure. Your brain likes comfort, so it wants to take the easy path. But the good news is—you can change that. By creating new habits, you can build new neuro pathways. The old pathway will fade, and your brain will no longer link alcohol with happiness.

Taking a break

The most common timeframe for taking a break from alcohol is 30 days. It’s an achievable goal, and during that time, you’ll start to notice the benefits. However, if you just grit your teeth and count the days, you might reinforce the idea that life is boring and no fun without alcohol. Instead, use this time to explore your relationship with alcohol.

Start by asking yourself questions like: Why do I drink? What does it give me? What are the upsides? What are the downsides? Use these 30 days to challenge your thoughts about drinking and question whether those thoughts are really true.

At the end of your break, you’ll have a clearer understanding of your relationship with alcohol. You can then decide whether to return to drinking, moderate your consumption, or extend your alcohol-free period.

There are plenty of communities, challenges, books, and podcasts that can help you reframe your thoughts and change your relationship with alcohol. Think of it as a fun experiment—embrace everything you learn along the way.